Seeking a Friend for the End of the World

If you are a single and had a chance to spend your last few days with any one person, whom would you choose?  Do they know it or is it your special little secret?

In "Seeking a Friend for the End of the World", Steve Carell (I would say his character's name but isn't he ALWAYS Steve Carell?) finds himself alone after his wife leaves in a panic. He decides to take a road trip to reunite with his high school sweetheart. Accompanying him is a young British woman whom I can't recall her name but whom I know was in a couple of those Pirates of the Caribbean movies.  She throws a wrench in his plans, of course, because all good movies need to have a wrench thrown into somebody's plans.

What they discover is the unspeakable value of having someone to share your battles with.  When you have someone like that, you have to hang onto them.  If (you're single and) have someone like that in your space, are you acting on it?  If you're married and don't open up and share what's really on your heart and mind, isn't that the same as being alone?  Are you waiting for time to run out before you do or say anything?

Stop waiting for a crisis to come around before you express yourself.  Good reminder from a pretty good movie.

Read More

7 Excuses That Will Destroy Your Dreams

Your dreams are NOT too big! 

They were placed in your heart by a BIG GOD!

Now that we have that out of the way, I want you to keep that in mind all the time! Don't let anyone convince you that anything you want is too much, too crazy, too big or too unlikely for you. Everything we see began as just a thought. And as soon as the thought was expressed, there came a critic. Guaranteed!

I don't want you to continue to be your own critic. You've got to be your own biggest fan to do great things. You do that by getting rid of every excuse you've carried around up to this point. Ready? Here are your top excuses right now. Pick your favorite from the list and DESTROY IT RIGHT NOW!!

Excuse #1 - "I’m not an expert."  NOBODY is an expert in the beginning.  There's an old saying that goes "Every master was once a disaster."  That's true.  Wherever you are, begin there.  You'll discover that most of the experts aren't that expert either.  You learn more of what you need to know along the journey.

Excuse #2 - "I’m too young/too old/too black/too white/too female/too male/too ANYTHING."  Have you ever considered that everything you consider to be a liability is really one of your better assets?  The world is looking for something different.  The things that are the same are already out there.  There is room for you.

Excuse #3 - "It’s tough in this economy."  When isn't it tough?  If you want to be real about it, most fortunes are made in times of crisis - when people are looking for answers.  Further, you have to be careful not to measure the world by your own situation.  Just because you might be lacking in some areas, doesn't mean others are and doesn't mean they aren't willing to pay you well for your solutions.

Excuse #4 - "People don’t support my dream."  Who cares?  "As a man thinks in his heart, so is he." is what the Bible says.  It doesn't say, "What your friends think you are, you are."  The opinion that determines your path is your own.  The support of other people comes and goes.  If you really crave it, don't worry.  It will come back once you're successful.

Excuse #5 - "It's risky. What if I fail?"  You might fail.  Can't lie to you.  Remember, however, that failure is an occurrence and not a person and not permanent.  You just keep going.  Persistence is the only thing that has a perfect track record.  Persistence never fails.

Excuse #6 - "I will do it one day. I don't have time right now."  This is maybe the most common out there today.  "One day" has stolen more potential than any other two words except "I can't."  Why not today?  Even if you can't get there today (I hope your dream is too big to accomplish in a day!), you can take steps.  Take a step each day.  You'll get there in time if you don't quit.

Excuse #7 - "I probably can’t beat the competition." There's no way to know unless you try.  Half of your competition is probably sweating the day the light bulb goes on for you anyway. They know they're vulnerable in some major ways.  They're just hoping nobody notices.  Instead of thinking about what happens when you lose, think about how sweet it will be when you win!

If I didn't name your favorite excuse, write it below and then make the OPPOSITE CONFESSION right now! It's time to kill your excuses before they kill your dreams!

To your success!

Read More

"If they're laughing, they're buying."

"The #1 trigger of human laughter is surprise." ~Jerry Corley

Set up their expectations... shatter their expectations... surprise them... equals laughter. Incongruity creates humor. Without incongruity, double-entendre and surprise, there is no humor. The best comedians incorporate these into their acts smoothly, but they are still using these basic formulae.

What does this have to do with you?

"If they're laughing, they're buying." ~ Jeffrey Gitomer



That's what it has to do with you. The more you can incorporate humor into what you already do, the more impact you'll have and the more money you'll make.  This is something I'm working on everyday!


To your success!

Mark Anthony McCray helps people live on PURPOSE, achieve higher PERFORMANCE and experience true PROSPERITY.  Be sure to subscribe to this blog so you don't miss a thing and forward this to a friend if you found it helpful. All material © Copyright, Mark Anthony McCray unless otherwise noted!

He can be reached in the following ways:
Mark@LiveBIGDieEmpty.com
Phone: 281-846-5720
Twitter: @LiveBIGDieEmpty
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/LiveBIGDieEmpty
LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/markanthonymccray/
Google+: https://plus.google.com/u/0/103149858138414160703/posts
YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/user/markanthonymccray
Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/markmccray/

For more information on Mark as a speaker or presenter check out http://livebigdieempty.blogspot.com/p/about-mark_29.html

Read More

The Mayonnaise Jar, Two Beers (and Priorities)

An old story... thanks to my friends at Lifestyles Unlimited for the reminder...

Mayonnaise Jar & Two Beers...

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 Beers.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him.

When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full.

They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.

The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full.

They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.

Of course, the sand filled up everything else.

He asked once more if the jar was full..

The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced two Beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand.

The students laughed..

'Now,' said the professor as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.

The golf balls are the important things---your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions---and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car..

The sand is everything else---the small stuff.

'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.

The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.

Spend time with your children.

Spend time with your parents.

Visit with grandparents.

Take your spouse out to dinner.

Play another 18 holes of golf.

There will always be time to clean the house, fix the disposal or deal with things from your job.

Take care of the golf balls first---the things that really matter.

Set your priorities.

The rest is just sand.

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the Beer represented.

The professor smiled and said, 'I'm glad you asked.'

The Beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of Beers with a friend.

How true.

Read More

Entrepreneurial Advice from the Front Lines!

Here are some of the great tips shared by my friends last week!  I posted this graphic (I'm so sophisticated that I wrote these on a whiteboard!) and asked my Facebook friends for feedback.  Here's what they had to say:

"Listen to your gut. Listen to people who are successful at what they do and what you do. Don't give people more credit then what they are really worth. Listen, listen, listen...evaluate. Follow your gut."  ~LaShonda Anderson

"To much to share here. Short version:

1. Know your purpose. Know what drives you, fuels you. Unless you do that FIRST and then connect that to why you want to be in business, you will never have the energy and passion you need to build a world class business. 
2. Become a student of business. Study successful business models. Study BUSINESS. There's an 80% failure rate in the first 5 years of business and of the 20% that survive, 80% fail in the next 5. That's 96% over 10 years. Know WHY they fail. 
3. Learn how to build a system that produces consistent results. Learn how to replicate it (make it teachable to others) so that you can create a business rather than an over glorified job. I could go on and on. :-)" ~Joe Orsak

"Be BOLD." ~Doc Compton

"Network network network. And don't be afraid of telling people what you do. Remember. Timid salesman have skinny kids, and we're all salesman.  Oh...... We're all a tad crazy too." ~Coy Christoffel

"My advice is this, focus on what you want to do. I wanted to start a business writing resumes so I did. I wanted a website and focused on learning how to build one. While it was important information, it didn't benefit me, it fustrated me. For the time and effort I should have just hired someone to do it for me. I lost the focus of what I was trying to do while saving a few dollars. Keep your sight on your vision and pay someone to help with the rest." ~Jessica Anderson

1. GO FLAT OUT. Do whatever it takes to achieve your goal and bring your dream to life.
2. SUPPORT YOUR IDEA. Invest your time, money, thought, and energy into it. If you don't, don't expect anyone else to.
3. KNOW WHAT YOU DO BEST. And do the HELL out of it!
4. GO FOR BROKE. Put your ass on the line. If you truly believe in your idea, it's worth risking everything you currently have.
5. SETBACKS ARE INEVITABLE. Don't let them get you down. Find things to keep yourself inspired. Remember, every failed attempt is another step forward.
6. LOOK AT THE BIG PICTURE. Look down the road, not just to next payday, or even next year. A wise, wealthy man once said, "I refuse to buy a Cadillac until I can write a check for it. If I have to wait a little while, that's okay; they'll still be making them then." That Escalade can wait. If you "make it" before you've made it, you'll end up a frustrated failure.
7. ELIMINATE DEBT, SAVE, & INVEST. You can not build wealth and pay on debts at the same time. It is mathmatically impossible. Create a tactical plan to eliminate all debt, including the house. The word "Mortgage" means "death grip." Don't save for EMERGENCIES, save for OPPORTUNITIES. Invest prudently in financial vehicles that will cause your money to replicate itself in your sleep. And remember, if it's on your ASS, it's not as ASSET.
8. MAKE YOUR OWN LUCK. Don't wait on handouts or "Right place, right time" thinking. Get out there and make it happen. Take it by force.
9. BE IN LOVE WITH YOUR IDEA. You'll be spending a lot of time with it, make sure you love what you're doing. Just making money gets boring after a while; do what your LOVE, and money will chase you down and tackle you to the ground every chance it gets. ~Michael Neal

"Surrounding yourself with like minded people is key, and I think may be the most important thing. While growing up I never thought about being a entrepreneur, but when I graduated from college I began to meet entrpreneurs every where I went just in my daily activities. After getting to know some of them, my mindset began to change and I began to develop a entreprenerial mind and spirit. And basically the rest is history. So it all started with spending time with other enterpreneurs.

I also think READING is a important part of being a entrepreneur as well. Read books about your industry and also books by other successful entrepreneurs because even though they may be in a different industry, you can apply some of the same principles to whatever your industry may be." ~Roscoe Douglas II 

To your success!

Mark Anthony McCray helps people live on PURPOSE, achieve higher PERFORMANCE and experience true PROSPERITY.  Be sure to subscribe to this blog so you don't miss a thing and forward this to a friend if you found it helpful. All material © Copyright, Mark Anthony McCray unless otherwise noted!

He can be reached in the following ways:
Mark@LiveBIGDieEmpty.com
Phone: 281-846-5720
Twitter: @LiveBIGDieEmpty
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/LiveBIGDieEmpty
LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/markanthonymccray/
Google+: https://plus.google.com/u/0/103149858138414160703/posts
YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/user/markanthonymccray
Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/markmccray/

For more information on Mark as a speaker or presenter check out http://livebigdieempty.blogspot.com/p/about-mark_29.html

Read More

How's Your Follow Up?

Are you aware of these Follow Up Statistics?

McGraw Hill did a study and found those businesses that boosted their marketing and advertising during a recession grew 275% over the 5 years proceeding. However, those businesses that cut back, if they were still in business, only grew 19%.

48% of sales people never follow up with a prospect

25% of sales people make a second contact and stop

12% of sales people only make three contacts and stop

10% of sales people make more than three contacts

Here's how that behavior affects your sales performance...

2% of Sales are made on the second contact

5% of sales are made on the third contact

10% of sales are made on the fourth contact

80% of sales are made on the fifth to twelfth contact

Are you committing any of these follow up statistics crimes? If you are, I would recommend automating your follow up by creating a system. If you aren't going to employ a system, then you've got to put more work into it. Either way, if you aren't contacting people again and again and again, you're costing yourself good business. The reality is very few people purchase on first hearing of you.

If you buy into the above stats, 80% of your revenue comes after the fifth contact. It looks like only 3% of sales require only one contact. Ahhhh.... so that's where your money is!!  Need more tips for increasing your sales performance?  Check out 10 Ultimate No B.S. #MonsterTips to Help You Sell More and Earn More Money NOW!


To your success!

Mark Anthony McCray helps people live on PURPOSE, achieve higher PERFORMANCE and experience true PROSPERITY.  Be sure to subscribe to this blog so you don't miss a thing and forward this to a friend if you found it helpful. All material © Copyright, Mark Anthony McCray unless otherwise noted!

He can be reached in the following ways:
Mark@LiveBIGDieEmpty.com
Phone: 281-846-5720
Twitter: @LiveBIGDieEmpty
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/LiveBIGDieEmpty
LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/markanthonymccray/
Google+: https://plus.google.com/u/0/103149858138414160703/posts
YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/user/markanthonymccray
Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/markmccray/

For more information on Mark as a speaker or presenter check out http://livebigdieempty.blogspot.com/p/about-mark_29.html

Read More

50 First Dates

I'll admit it.  I'm a sucker for this movie.  No question it gets to me every time. In it, Adam Sandler's character, Henry Roth, is a man afraid of commitment up until he meets the beautiful, forgetful Lucy (Drew Barrymore). They hit it off and Henry think he's finally found the girl of his dreams, until he discovers she has short-term memory loss and forgets him the very next day. It turns out, she forgets him everyday.

Think about how great it would be if our real lives could work more like this? Every day isn't a great day. Some are great. Some are horrible. But every morning she has no recollection of his sins, errors and omissions. Every morning he must work to win her affections. (The hidden message is interesting... the movie probably wouldn't work as well with the roles reversed.)

Many talk about relationship skills. I still say the #1 skill we all need is to learn how to forgive quickly, completely and often. It's the only thing we're all going to have to do every single day if we hope to have a happy and healthy relationship (and life).

That's the beautiful message of 50 First Dates. The best relationships carry very little of yesterday into today.

Read More

Dealing with Temptation

Q: Dear Mark, I am finding the temptation to have an affair overwhelming. My husband had one years ago that destroyed me and I'm still trying to recover from that. Plus, to be honest, there's the attraction. He takes my breath away. What is your perspective? I'm just trying to understand what's going on. I need to hear from a man.
Like · · Share

A: Thank you for writing Be Worth Finding! Here are a few things for you to think about...

1. I can understand the longing for passion and excitement and need to feel loved. I can. However, I don't see the cost as being worth it to you. Whether it's fair or right or not, once discovered, the chances of your husband accepting it are slim. Divorce is very likely. Violence is possible. Depression is probable and it could take you years to pull your life back to just an even level emotionally. Studies show it takes women 3-4 years to recover. Men, too. For you, consider at this point that you've been married more than half your life. I think it could be devastating and much more than you think.

The financial costs are tremendous, as well. I just wouldn't advise it. There are tons of articles on it. I won't retread that topic. Just know that you will probably have about half of the resources available to you that you think you'll have...and you'll be raising your children essentially alone.

2. You have unmet needs. NEEDS. Not wants. I've blogged on the topic of His Needs/Her Needs before.

If there is any possible way, please sit down with your husband and talk about NEEDS. You need affection, communication, etc. Let him know that. Bring that book maybe. Also examine honestly whether you're meeting his needs. Remember... they are needs and they are legitimate. If you're looking around, that normally means they aren't being met. He probably had some that went unmet, too.

Here's a couple of tips from the trenches... (A) ask him for a time to talk. Literally set an appointment if you must. That way he won't feel backed into a corner. Honor it. Defer your thoughts until the time. It should only be a day or two. (B) Sit down to talk. Touch each other. Hold hands or something. This makes it easier for both to listen and lessens the likelihood of tensions escalating. Hopefully this can start some dialogue that is sorely missing.

3. Your recollection concerning my other post is right. I have little respect for men who choose to go this route of pursuing married women. I have contempt for them. He's done this before. He obviously senses your desire and wants to take advantage of it. What's worse is he's hindering the happiness you could be experiencing right now! He can't give you anything but a few (dangerous) moments or he'd at least leave his wife and make an attempt at being a steady presence in your life.

Similarly on your end. If you're going to leave, most states can finalize a divorce in 60 days or so. You can wait that long. I hope. But I really hope you and your husband make one more attempt. If you need to have a counselor present, it would help a lot, I'm sure.

What do you think? If any of this sounds insensitive, I don't mean to be that way at all. I just have seen too many lives get worse instead of better as a result of affairs. I would not want you to worsen your situation or happiness.

"Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you." ~James 4:7

Read More

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em!

What were you doing at 4AM this morning? One of my new clients was working out before getting to the office by 6AM.

As I sat with him today, he organized a few of his bills... dropping a $24.95/month service because it was "too much" compared to a similar $15.95 service. Cancelled a $12.99/month service because it was redundant. Made a note to himself to check again after six months to make sure he was getting what he's paying for.

Another small matter came up. He picked up the phone and dealt with it. No post-it notes. No reminders. Problem in. Problem addressed.

As I sat there during our meeting watching him handle a few other matters, I'm humbled. His lunch is brought in. Coke Zero. A single veggie wrap with some fresh tomatoes on the side.

Another meeting was kicking off as I left. I walked in just as he was wrapping up another. He'll be at work until probably 8PM. Regular day. One of his kids and grandchildren stopped by the office to say hello. They were waiting for his next meeting to wrap up before spending a little time with grandpa before he gets back to work. Still a lot of sunlight left in the day.

I left his office needing a little bit of paperwork from him. It was all in my inbox before I got out of traffic.

I swear there is not a single lazy, procrastinating bone in this man's body! I stand amazed and inspired to be more focused and professional in my own right... While many others will spend several hours a day complaining about him... Maybe in the afternoon. 4AM is too early to get up! He's in the 1%. Surely he hasn't earned any of his money or status?

My only point is this.  I'm not deifying anyone.  I admire people who make the most of their opportunities for sure.  However, most people have a lot of work, diligence and vision left to manifest in their own lives before they have room to complain about the successes of other people.  If you think about this for your own life, you know it's true.

Read More

"Diary of a Cheating Woman"

Watching "Diary of a Cheating Woman", a so-called documentary about the rise of women committing adultery. I have not been so embarrassed for us in a long time.  Kind of sad really.  I guess the premise is to laugh and joke about how it's okay to cheat if the guy isn't a good enough man for you - whether he was unfaithful or not.  Set aside the fact that paying back evil for evil is against everything the Word of God stands for.  Celebrating those who sin is the worst kind of sin.  I am forever ashamed for every person involved in this project.

"Don't repay evil for evil. Don't retaliate with insults when people insult you. Instead, pay them back with a blessing. That is what God has called you to do, and he will bless you for it." ~1 Peter 3:9

"Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable." ~Romans 12:17

"See that no one pays back evil for evil, but always try to do good to each other and to all people." ~1 Thessalonians 5:15

To be fair, it wasn't only about the women.  There were a number of men interviewed who said they were prompted to commit adultery because of their own trust issues and/or because they learned their wives or girlfriends were already cheating.

Why am I writing about this?  Research.  These kinds of things help me understand where people are and how they think.  Also, I know for a fact that a number of my readers are dealing with these kinds of issues daily and haven't understood what the Bible has to say about these matters of the heart.  If you are okay with any of this, you need to check your heart and repent.  You are broken.

I need to wash my eyes out now.  Or maybe my ears.

Read More