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3/12/12

Great Questions to Ask Before Marrying!? - Part 2

As promised in Part 1, here are the Sex and Relationship questions! You might consider printing these out and using them as a conversation piece over dinner or coffee! That way you can use me as the bad guy! Say it's my fault for bringing these up! These are the good ones...


I rarely read AskMen.com but I found an article that shared some great advice for all of us...

In the early stages of a relationship, talking about an ex should be completely off-limits. They just aren't relevant to the new thing you have going on. Later, as you start to find out more about each other, references to past boyfriends/girlfriends should be limited -- ideally to just a name, a time and a description of why it ended.

It's important to show you aren't still emotionally involved in the relationship, which means you shouldn't recount every little thing she did to hurt you. When giving a reason for the breakup, stick to generalities, such as “We were heading in different directions” or “We just outgrew each other,” rather than a blow-by-blow account of every argument you had.

Don't overplay all the bad points of past relationships in an attempt to show the new girl you're over an ex. You'll come across as bitter and still stuck on it. This also sends warning signals to her that if the two of you break up it could be a nasty, drawn-out process.


Good stuff. But, still, at some point I've learned you need to lay your cards on the table honestly.

RELATIONSHIP HISTORY

33. Have you ever felt deeply insecure in a relationship? Were you able to name your fear?
34. When was the first time you felt that you were in love with another person? What happened in that relationship, and how have you come to terms with it?
35. What is the longest relationship you have ever had prior to this one? Why did it end, and what lesson did you learn?
36. Have you ever been married? If so, are you divorced or widowed? How do you think you handled the loss?
37. If you have a current partner, do they know of behaviors that you exhibited in your previous relationship that you are not proud of?
36. Do you believe that past relationships should be left in the past and not talked about in your current relationship?
39. Do you tend to judge current partners on past relationships?
40. Have you ever sought marriage counseling? What did the experience teach you?
41. Do you have children from previous marriages or non-marital relationships? What is your relationship with them? How do you see your relationship with them in the future?
42. Have you ever been engaged to be married but didn’t go through with the wedding?
43. Have you ever had a live-in partner? Why did you choose to live together instead of marrying? What did your experience teach you about the importance of marriage and about commitment?
44. Do you harbor fears that the person you love might reject you or fail out of love with you?


SEX

45. What sexual activities do you enjoy the most? Are there specific sexual acts that make you uncomfortable? Be specific! This is no time to hedge.
46. Do you feel comfortable initiating sex? If yes, why? If no, why?
47. What do you need in order to be in the mood for sex?
48. Have you ever been sexually abused or assaulted?
48. What was the attitude toward sex in your family? Was it talked about? Who taught you about sex?
50. Do you use sex to self-medicate? If something upsets you, do you use sex to try to help you feel better?
51. Have you ever felt forced to have sex to keep the peace? Have you ever forced someone or been told that you forced someone to have sex with you to keep the peace?
52. Is sexual fidelity an absolute necessity in a good marriage?
53. Do you enjoy viewing pornography?
54. How often do you need or expect sex?
55. Have you ever a sexual relationship with a person of the same sex?
56. Has sexual dissatisfaction ever been a factor for you in the breakup of a relationship?

Next time...in Part 3...the diet/health, looks and parenting approach questions!! How important are your partner's looks to you?? These should be good!

Please leave me your comments so I know how to serve you better!! If this was helpful, forward it to a friend. Talk to you soon! Please subscribe and visit me on my Live BIG! Die Empty. Facebook page!!


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