6 Things to Do When You're Scared to Death

Have you every felt terrified about your life, your job, your future?  Come on.  Be honest.  I have.  I'll be honest.  I feel like I've had a long relationship with fear and worry.  I know what terror feels like.  It's a step beyond anxiety and two steps beyond just worrying.  Terror freezes you in your tracks.

The good news is I have finally divorced terror.  Of course, it keeps trying to come around, but we're not in a relationship anymore.  Fear doesn't live with me any longer.  Terror is a horrible thing and, as an entrepreneur/ministry worker/father/single parent you are going to deal with it from time to time until you learn how to press through it.  Here are some ways that I've learned how to keep going.

1.  Remember that YOU are a lion.  You have been given the gift to be bold as a lion.  The Word of God reminds Believers that your standing in God gives you permission to stand and not retreat.  What enemy should make you turn back? Nothing! Timidity is not your birthright so don't claim it.

2.  Change the story you tell yourself.  Pick a power statement that you can rehearse to yourself again and again.  You have got to stop reading the bad news to yourself about yourself.  You are NOT helping anything.  You're only dragging yourself down further.  Remind yourself  "I can do this."  "I can make it through this."  "This is not the final page in my story."  "I will win in the end."

3.  Do not allow yourself to be broken.  The Bible tells you over and over not to be dismayed.  To be dismayed means to be cast down, broken or shattered.  Discouragement happens.  That is a natural part of life.  Don't let your troubles break you.  Your enemy wants you broken.  Your enemy wants you to stay down.  He knows you'll win in the end if only you don't quit.

4.  Command yourself to be grateful and not worry.  Literally sit down and count your blessings.  Make a list.  Are you listening to me?  I'm saying actually take out a sheet of paper and remind yourself of all the great things in your life that you know you didn't and don't deserve.  If you are honest, you will admit there are many of them.  Being grateful is a great way to rid yourself of worries.

5.  Brainstorm solutions.  I learned this from Brian Tracy.  Sit down and think of twenty actions you can take right now to change your situation.  The first five will be easy.  The second five might take you a minute.  Then the work really begins.  Press through until you have at least twenty options in front of you on a sheet of paper.

6.  Take an action.  If you're really going to be bold, take several.  Go through the list you just made and find something you can do right now.  It doesn't matter if it's large or small.  What truly matters is that you make a decision and act on it.  Your intention is to start a virtuous cycle.

I hope you can use one or two of these to help you in your walk.  Stop allowing fear to paralyze and depress you.  You will find out (as I did) that every worry is valuable energy wasted.  I want to see you grab hold of God's best for your life.  I'm in the battle with you.  Let's win this thing!

Are you looking for more guidance on building and expanding your business or just getting some clarity in your life to improve your personal productivity?  Do you want to join a like-mined group of professionals where you can learn to press through your goals together?  Check out my Peak Performance Group Coaching.  It could be the place for you to start making real progress towards your most important goals.

Now, tell me something... how have YOU learned to press through fear?

Mark Anthony McCray helps people live on PURPOSE, achieve higher PERFORMANCE and experience true PROSPERITY.  Be sure to subscribe to this blog so you don't miss a thing and forward this to a friend if you found it helpful. All material © Copyright, Mark Anthony McCray unless otherwise noted!



He can be reached in the following ways:
Mark@LiveBIGDieEmpty.com
Phone: 281-846-5720
Twitter: @LiveBIGDieEmpty
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/LiveBIGDieEmpty
LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/markanthonymccray/
Google+: https://plus.google.com/u/0/103149858138414160703/posts
YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/user/markanthonymccray

For more information on Mark as a speaker or presenter check out http://www.gigsalad.com/mark_anthony_mccray_houston

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"Seven Things I Learned from Rap Music"

Since the days of Kurtis Blow, I have loved rap music.  I'll grant you that some of it's becoming hard to justify, but there are some lessons that I've learned from it over the years that have helped me in life. Here are some of my favorites:

"You don't grind, you don't shine." - Mike Jones

If this current economy has reminded us of anything, it's that most of us should no longer expect financial prosperity to come without sacrifice. Solomon said that there is profit in all hard work and the converse is true: if you don't grind, you don't shine. Put your top effort into creating the future you desire.

"If I can't change the people around me, I change the people around me." - Chuck D

The Bible says that we should not be deceived; that bad company corrupts good morals. Throughout the Proverbs, there are warnings to choose our friends and associations very carefully. A lot of who we become results from those with whom we spend the majority of our time. Surround yourself with people who are pursuing purpose.

"Before we go any further, let's be friends." - Whodini

Relationship advice from the great Rappin' Jalil (or was it Ecstacy? or Grandmaster Dee?). A lot of times we push relationships too far, too fast because of infatuation and hormones. I advise my sisters all the time to resist the urge to let relationships become "sexualized" too soon because once a guy has sex on his mind, he can't think. Let's not just get to know one another. Let's be friends.

"You see me? I eat, sleep, _____ and talk rap. You see that '98 Mercedes on TV? I bought that." - Juvenile

One thing that I've always admired in successful people is their focus. Solomon spoke of this, too, when he advised that we should do with all our might whatever it is that we do. This is in Ecclesiastes 9:10 in case you're wondering.

"It's what you keep, not what you cop." ~Beanie Sigel

Making money doesn't profit much if you spend it all. We Americans have developed the nasty habit of spending even MORE than we earn.  W. Clement Stone said, "If you cannot save money, the seeds of greatness are not in you."  Wise words.  Very. 


"Don't let a win go to your head or a loss to your heart." - Chuck D

Fight to stay encouraged when things are tough by taking control of your emotions. Don't take it personally. Things happen to all of us in this life. Also, use the positive emotions of victories to propel yourself forward without becoming complacent. Good seasons don't last always the same way Winter doesn't last forever.

"It takes two to make a thing go ri-ight! It takes two to make it out of sight!" ~Rob Base and DJ EZ Rock (See also Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 because Solomon said it, too: "Two are better than one...")

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Learning to Be Honest About Who You Are...

...is a very challenging thing at times. It's a challenge I thought I'd beaten 100% until I discovered that there is more inside me than I thought (and I think pretty highly of myself at times). Now I'm finding myself looking in the mirror (again) and being challenged (again) to find a higher level in life. The truth is I've been selling myself and severely undervaluing myself.  I can see that now.

But how about you?  How honest are you about who you are and what you are?  How honest are you about where you want to be in life?  That's the first step towards walking in the peace and fulfillment you want.  Honesty.  Then you can start taking steps towards the life you want - that you were meant to live - but it can't happen until you come face-to-face with YOU and accept who you are.

Realize, too, that where you are isn't where you have to remain.  But reaching any destination first begins with figuring out where you are.

Subscribe to this blog.  Let's journey together!

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Guarding Your Thoughts

Why are you who you are? Why are you where you are? Where will you be tomorrow?

This is really basic today.  You are who you are because of the way you think about yourself. You are where you are in life because of the ways you've processed thoughts. You will be where you will be tomorrow because of how you think today.  I wish this had been more suspenseful. This is one of those "it is what it is" moments. A wise man once wrote it this way: "Carefully guard your thoughts because they are the source of true life."

• Your thoughts become your fantasies.
• Your fantasies lead to feelings.
• Feelings become acts.
• Acts become habits.
• Habits become your character.
• Your character becomes your destiny.

I'll never forget the first time I heard that last part.  My business law professor told me as I was finishing up my MBA.  He meant it as an encouragement to me.  He was telling me that my life would turn out well because I was a man of character.  He didn't fill out the rest of the formula for me, however.  I took me a while to put it all together.  Turns out he was 100% right.

Your dominant thoughts always become your destiny.  Watch what you think.  Only think on things that will take you the direction you want to go.  No exceptions!  No exceptions ever!  Focus on the content of your thinking and the rest will take care of itself.

One of the ways you can guard your thoughts is by making sure you're reading motivational, educational and inspirational material all the time.  Subscribe to this blog for some good brain and soul food!!

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Never Allow Average to Become Acceptable!

You are NOT an "Average Joe" by any means!  I'm not even hearing that!

The time for settling is over. No more settling in your finances. No more settling in your relationships. No more settling in your passion. No more settling in your purpose! Far too many of you are living below your privilege and have become comfortable there. Consider this your wake-up call. I'll let you hit snooze once. After that I'm coming with the cold water!

Surround yourself with people who expect excellence out of you and also expect excellence out of yourself.  Never settle again!  There is NO REASON you can't walk in greatness.  NONE!!

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Thank God for Cheerleaders!

Everybody needs a cheerleader!  Even me.

Last week I began to notice that my internal dialogue had become poisoned. I don't know how it happened. I honestly don't. I started catching myself saying negative, unproductive and critical things to myself and my life and situation. This isn't me. Where did this come from? I didn't know, but I was seeing how my mood was poor and my optimism and energy were being drained away from me slowly. This isn't me. Not usually.

But I'm thankful the Lord sent me a few cheerleaders to remind me of all the great things that are in me!

Sometimes negative people and situations can sap our strength and we don't even realize it's happening.  I can't always be around my cheerleaders, so I'm fighting back.  I'm confessing good words over my life and my future.  I'm believing for greater things and good outcomes... the way I usually do!  I hope you'll do the same!

Subscribe. Let me help you keep your internal dialogue healthy and productive!  Also, thank God for cheerleaders!  Also thank God for allowing me to find a fully-clothed one for this post.  That's harder to do than you think!

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How Iron Sharpens Iron

A true friend reminds you of your righteousness instead of your wretchedness. Iron sharpens iron. Truth. But how does this happen? I would suggest that it doesn't happen through criticism...primarily because most people don't know how to offer it.

"Mark, but...but..."

Hear me out for a moment. There is ALWAYS a way to say anything. Look up what the Proverbs say about a "word fitly spoken" and share your thoughts with me. Also, remember that it takes eleven sincere compliments to undo the damage of one criticism.

Therefore, let me share THREE ways to offer feedback that will more likely be received and EDIFY the hearer:

(1) Offer "feedback" instead of "constructive criticism" in every case. Just hearing the word "criticism" will make people grow tense. Instead say "May I offer you some feedback?" It's always feedback because feedback doesn't automatically lend a negative connotation to the situation.

(2) Never offer feedback without their permission. If they say "No" it is really okay. The world won't end. Maybe they don't want to hear what you have to say right now. They will live and so will you. Often your feedback hasn't been received well in the past because YOU needed to say it more than they needed to hear it. Get past yourself. If they don't give you permission to continue, don't. Simple as that.

(3) Sandwiches. This is an old technique that still works. Sandwich the feedback between sincere compliments. This is easy. Start with something positive they've accomplished, insert a way they can improve and close with a reinforcement of their value to you and their accomplishments. This reinforces that you're coming from a place of RELATIONSHIP with them and that you're not seeking to sever the relationship by way of your words.

People tend to gravitate towards their praise and grow more by way of positive expectations and reinforcements than from criticisms. It reminds of me a quote I heard from a Philadelphia sports fan who was overhead booing Hall of Famer Mike Schmidt. When asked why, he said "I'm trying to make him better!" How ridiculous to think a Hall of Fame Ballplayer was moved by his boos! I'll bet you a dollar the "great cloud of witnesses" is cheering you on... not waiting for you to stumble so they can point out your flaws.

To your success!

Mark Anthony McCray helps people live on PURPOSE, achieve higher PERFORMANCE and experience true PROSPERITY. Be sure to subscribe to this blog so you don't miss a thing and forward this to a friend if you found it helpful. All material © Copyright, Mark Anthony McCray unless otherwise noted!

He can be reached in the following ways:
Mark@LiveBIGDieEmpty.com
Phone: 281-846-5720
Twitter: @LiveBIGDieEmpty
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/LiveBIGDieEmpty
LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/markanthonymccray/
Google+: https://plus.google.com/u/0/103149858138414160703/posts
YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/user/markanthonymccray
Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/markmccray/

For more information on Mark as a speaker or presenter check out http://livebigdieempty.blogspot.com/p/about-mark_29.html

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How Badly Do You Want It?

...so you have to decide how badly you want it. Do you want "it" enough to change? Your words SAY you've received a vision - direction from God - but when are you going to totally sell out to bringing it into manifestation.

(You believe that ultimately the "answer of the tongue belongs to the Lord" but you also know you haven't done all YOU can do!)

...so how badly do you want God's best for your life? For your family? Do you want it enough to fast? To pray? To push away that plate? To make an extra phone call? To wake up earlier in the morning or go to bed earlier at night? To invest in your education or at least buy (and read) that book? To knock on a few doors? To step out of your fears and walk in faith? To get your emotions under control and stop letting them drive you?

If there isn't something on that list or on your own that you're willing to do differently, you're still just talking. You don't want "it" badly enough yet.  Join me on Facebook and subscribe to this blog a part of your action!  Let's progress together!

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You Have Permission to Be Great(er)!

The Word for somebody today is "Go get it!"

As I was praying a few weeks ago concerning a few specific things that I feel like I'm lacking (both wants and needs are acceptable to pray for according to Phil 4:6), I was commanded to stop asking and go get them!! Then, as I often do, I asked whether I should share this or was that just for me.

Here's the reality for somebody... I'm giving you permission to go for your desires!! Do you want to start a non-profit? Go for it! Do you want to become a counselor? Start a business? Manufacture a product? Broadcast a television show?  Nobody's stopping you but you. You've got permission!  What is it that you've been waiting on permission to go do?  Stop waiting and go get it!

Get your permission slip here --->  LINKY POO and then send me a pic or post it to my Facebook page!!  Thank you!!!

Mark Anthony McCray helps people live on PURPOSE, achieve higher PERFORMANCE and experience true PROSPERITY. Be sure to subscribe to this blog so you don't miss a thing and forward this to a friend if you found it helpful. All material © Copyright, Mark Anthony McCray unless otherwise noted!

He can be reached in the following ways:

Mark@LiveBIGDieEmpty.com
Phone: 281-846-5720
Twitter: @LiveBIGDieEmpty
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/LiveBIGDieEmpty
LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/markanthonymccray/
Google+: https://plus.google.com/u/0/103149858138414160703/posts
YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/user/markanthonymccray
Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/markmccray/

Click HERE for information on Mark as a speaker or presenter and HERE to learn about coaching programs to help you realize your potential and live more prosperously!

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Breathe

Pray for me. No, really. Pray for me!!

Do you ever have those days or weeks where you feel stressed out of your mind?! There has been so much coming at me this week (in a good way) and that's where I am a little bit. I'm blogging this right now as a way to stop and force myself to breathe, de-stress and meditate on God's promises over my life? Too religious for some people, I'm sure.

Still...the reality is I have those times just like everyone else. Maybe more than some. Therefore, I am going to do four things before I get back to work:

1. Take several deep, very deep breaths.
2. Force myself to smile.
3. Remind myself of all the promises the Lord has made me regarding my future.
4. Take a step in that direction.

I posted on my Facebook page and I've blogged about it before how sometimes the challenges that we have in front of us look not only challenging, but overwhelming! "How can I do THAT!? I don't even know where to start!" I'm going to do the only thing any of us can do in those moments: breathe, smile, trust God and move forward.

I've already prayed asking the Lord for wisdom, guidance and favor. As a Believer, I have to trust that God hears and answers my prayers...that they aren't just exercises in speaking words into the air. Therefore, the only thing left is to add the only two ingredients I can inject into the equation: faith and action.

I hope you're doing the same!

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