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12/4/11

Day Four: "His Needs, Her Needs: The Top 5 Things a Man NEEDS!"

This follows our entry from yesterday focusing on the top 5 things a woman needs from her husband.  I'm biased, but I like this one more!!




Before I jump in, let's recall the primary premise.  (If you're a woman reading this, you liked it yesterday.  You said "Amen!" so don't go silent on me now!!)  The premise is this: a need is a NEED.  It will be fulfilled or damage the person if they don't get it fulfilled.  I've said before to think about these like water - you can live without it, but not very long.  And when he doesn't have it, a man will normally go get it.  Take that however you want.


Let's get to the list!


#1 SEXUAL FULFILLMENT:
"The typical wife doesn’t understand her husband's need for sex any more than the typical husband understands his wife's need for affection. This need in men is so strong that it must be satisfied -- in or out of the marriage. When a man binds himself in marriage, he makes the assumption that his wife will be available to him sexually. If that is not the case, it it sets the stage for an affair -- which will be destructive to the marriage."

#2 RECREATIONAL COMPANIONSHIP:
The need to have fun with his partner is the second need Harley identifies for men. As already stated, we often put our best foot forward in the courtship and this is anotherarea where there may be disappointment after the "I do". "Why don't you do this with me anymore?" is a common lament. Harley cautions wives that having fun together doing the things that you both like is essential to the marriage. "Men place surprising importance on having their wives as recreational companions."

#3 AN ATTRACTIVE SPOUSE:
"A man with a need for an attractive spouse feels good whenever he looks at his attractive wife. In fact, that is what emotional needs are all about. When one of his emotional needs is met he feels fulfilled, and when it's not met, he feels frustrated. It may sound immature or superficial, but I've found that most men have a need for an attractive wife. They do not appreciate a woman for her inner qualities alone. They appreciate the way she looks."

#4 DOMESTIC SUPPORT:
He needs peace and quiet. There may be a cultural change/demand that says that men need to take more responsibility in the home for domestic chores, but most men are not embracing this change. The male has a deep need for his wife to "take care of things" -especially take care of him.

#5 ADMIRATION/RESPECT:
HE NEEDS HER TO BE PROUD OF HIM. Why do males have this need? Admiration energizes and motivates a man and he often expects his wife to be his most ardent fan. He needs to be appreciated for what he IS, not for what he COULD BECOME. While criticism causes men to become defensive, his wife's encouragement enables him to become more confident and achieve much more.

Let's take it back to the top.  These are needs.  These are not wants.  I can talk about each a lot more if you send me a question.  I'm ready!!! LOL

PS - Respect is NOT love.  Period.

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